It has been a rough year for everyone. With loss and anxiety spreading across the globe, it can be difficult to remain optimistic. I’ll be the first to admit I spend more time struggling with emotions than seeing the silver lining.
The year has also offered many opportunities for growth. I’m finally getting around to read books that had been stacked in my room for years. I have discovered new authors and made progress on my trilogy.
We are all enduring abnormal amounts of anxiety as we hope for the way to clear. We have either lost loved ones, or experienced the sense of losing ourselves.
Whenever I find myself choking in negativity, I go outside and see a flower. There is still beauty in this world.
As I contemplated the flowers in my garden today, I realized that I can find peace in my own garden to begin with, even if I can’t go much farther; every bloom is a reminder that God is still here and that He loves us.
For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed.
Romans 8:19, NIV
It is easy to lose our grip on faith with all of these challenges set before us; we don’t understand why it’s happening. I have come to see that, in times like these, we need to hold onto our Catholic faith more.
We need to cling to the truth, the thing that never changes, the comfort of Christ’s promise.
I started a new prayer journal. It’s a place where I am raw with my emotions; some days I am more hopeful than others. He understands. In my prayer journal, I’m taking my questions and placing them at His feet.
We are tempted to lose hope with the world as it is now; walking away from God is a sure way to feel weaker, more helpless.
I will choose the little way like St. Therese of Lisieux, finding God in my garden and content to be a little flower, if that is His will. After all, I believe each flower in my garden is beautiful, regardless of size or color.
For me, prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy.
― St. Therese of Lisieux
Seek the truth in prayer, in the Bible, in your garden, in the silence when you can only hear your breathing. Turn to the saints who felt despair and plead their intercession. Seize this opportunity to learn context, history, and find ground that does not wobble beneath you.
I used to be passionate about apologetics, until they bored me. Now, their complexity is a comfort, not a burden. Our faith is woven with fact and history, martyrs, great thinkers, and ordinary people. They also went through trying times; they will guide you through this.
Remember to stay safe and healthy. This can’t last forever, and we will all emerge stronger, knowing what really matters. When it’s harder to walk, take another step. When it’s harder to believe, dig deeper.
My next read is Jesus of Nazareth by Pope Benedict XVI. I am going to try and read at least one spiritual book every two weeks, aside from the Bible, which is daily bread. What are you reading?
Mariella Hunt 
I’m glad I’m not the only Catholic who is really struggling with even more anxiety and depression than normal. I, too, love flowers and St. Thérèse of Lisieux. She is my Confirmation saint. Have you read her autobiography, Story of a Soul?
Nice to meet you! Yes I am constantly on the verge of tears and I was almost going to let go of “the ship” but realized that being adrift rather than choosing the One who calms the storm will kill me spiritually.
I love St Therese! I often feel her around interceding like a sister. I read it most recently last year, and at some points found myself smiling because she and I agree so much lol, I may as well have written some passages. I think she’s just the one to calm us through this!
I might read her autobiography again this year. There’s just something so soothing about it!